Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
