He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
my phone needs a breathalizer
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
