he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
