just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
