i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
