Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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