His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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