I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
