Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
