Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
