Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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