I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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