hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You need a sexual gate keeper
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize