love makes seman taste better
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
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