he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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