just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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