Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Randomize
