I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
