D3 body, D1 cock
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
