is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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