ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
