I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
