hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
