Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
