I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
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