living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
