glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
