Nicole vs. Life
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
