He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
