It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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