He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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