Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
