Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize