I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
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