Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
