I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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