HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
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