the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
