He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
