Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We're too hungover to prance.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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