Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
