Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
