jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
