But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
