playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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