worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
