dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
