Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
