life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
she pinky promised me she was 18
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize