I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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