Jerry, you need to find god
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
